Subject of the lesson: breastfeeding.
Since the beginning of the pregnancy I had heard about how hard breastfeeding is. Not how hard it can be - how hard it is. I considered taking a class, but in the end decided not to because :drumroll:
Women have been breastfeeding for thousands of years and the species has survived this long. It's a natural process, so it must be instinctual.
Well, to some extent it is instinctual. We know to put the baby on the breast and the baby knows to suck. But if that's all you know or all you're doing then the process will probably be rather difficult. It's been difficult enough for me and I'm one of the lucky ones whose baby has a good latch and my milk production is excellent.
What my assumption didn't take into account is that there are instincts and there are learned behaviors, and almost always those two factors have to be combined. For instance, you and I have an instinct to eat, but we have to learn what we can eat. Women instinctively know to put a newborn to the breast, but need some kind of guidance to do it effectively.
In earlier times people lived in smaller communities and were surrounded by birth (and death). Feeding a baby at the breast was something that young girls and women witnessed as a matter of course and could be explicitly taught by other members of the community if need be. More recently we've lost that. The nuclear family exposes us to fewer births, and societal norms tend to hide breastfeeding moms behind a blanket, in separate rooms, or at home. We don't see breastfeeding as a normal part of everyday life anymore; it's something that separates moms from society now. It's something that isn't usually discussed. Some people even put it in the same category as using the bathroom or masturbating - things that are unsanitary and offensive to do in front of other people. All of this hinders knowledge being filtered down or taught to new moms.
There are some things that I did know ahead of time that helped me to stick with breastfeeding after the first few days. Even that bit of knowledge, though, came with implications that I hadn't thought of ahead of time.
Here are some things that I knew followed by some additional information that no one warned me about.
A newborn's stomach is the size of a marble; all it needs during the first few days can be supplied by colostrum.
What I didn't think of: it doesn't take long for that stomach to empty, either. The baby will cry for food very often throughout the day and night. It was physically and emotionally draining to meet the baby's needs during this time. I recommend Lansinoh after at least every other feeding to prevent against cracked nipples.
Milk comes in later, usually 3-5 days after birth. The breasts may become engorged with milk and sore.
What I didn't know: baby's stomach hadn't caught up to the supply yet, so nursing only relieved so much of the discomfort. Also, the milk leaked. For me it leaked a lot and soaked right through my cloth nursing pads. The disposables (with a protective plastic lining) worked a ton better.
Milk comes out through the nipples (I know, I'm digging deep here, right?)
What I didn't know: there is more than one let-down of milk during a feeding. Meaning, the milk will come through the nipples and then stop flowing for a bit. With continued suckling after a few minutes the milk will come through again.
What I really, really wish I had known: some women (like me, heh) have what is known as a "forceful let-down" at first. This is where your breasts become a milk cannon and shoot breast milk out sometimes 2 feet from your body. This isn't pleasant for anyone, especially the nursing baby, and it makes a giant mess. A quick search of Google yields a lot of good advice about how to slow the flow or at least minimize the force. None of this advice worked for me. The same search also says that it should let up after a few weeks. Five and a half weeks later and I'm still waiting patiently.
Babies go through growth spurts.
What I didn't know: baby will ask for milk like he's in the middle of a nic fit during a growth spurt. During a growth spurt my kid goes from 0 to starving in approximately 0.00003 seconds. This is physically and emotionally trying in the same way that it was before my milk came in.
You need to drink plenty of water during the time that you're nursing.
What I didn't know: you want to drink all that extra water WHILE you're nursing. And I always forget this until after the baby is already latched on.
Nursing is a great opportunity to bond with your baby.
What I didn't know: how much of his little personality and funny quirks I would get to know during this time. Even though it's tough on both of us some of the time I'm so glad that I decided to stick with breast feeding.
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